Other Things
by of-ferrets-and-weaselettes
Summary: What we all wanted in Eclipse but didn't get. I may add more to this later, but for now, it's a one-shot. E/B


I was having this dream. I'd had it more and more often since the day I'd picked our wedding date. It was of me, of us. Me in my beautiful dress, Edward standing much too far away, too beautiful for his tuxedo. Alice laughing, and even Rosalie looks slightly pleased when she looks at Emmett. Carlisle is beaming and Esme can't stop crying. Then our hands are joined, some man I've never seen asks for our vows, and it's the way he says, "I Do." I know it's not just "I love you", because I know that. It's "I love you enough to do something I could never do for myself. I love you enough to give you what you want. I love you infinitely. I love you enough to change you." And when I say it back, it's not just, "I do." What I'm really saying is, "I Know."

Usually I wake from this dream slightly disoriented and with a confused look on my face. Many mornings Edward has asked me what I dreamt, but I've exploited the fact that he can't read my thoughts every time, saying I couldn't remember. But this time, as I see us kissing in front of everyone, and hear the proverbial church bells ring, I'm laughing. And then I'm drifting into consciousness, and I can feel Edward's strong, cold body next to me. And he's kissing my neck, his fingers lightly caressing the curves of my neck and shoulders, his mouth so cold it sends shivers down my spine. His feather-light touches have found the sensitive spots on my neck, and it's here that I realize the laughing in the dream is the same as my laughter here, in my room. 

The laughter becomes more of a smile as I feel him continue. He whispers against my pulse point, "It's morning, love."

My fingers run up his neck and into his hair, pressing him harder against my skin, telling him not to stop. "And a good morning it is, too."

Edward breathed a laugh and continued his ministrations, moving to my collarbone as his hands ran up and down the curves of my sides. My leg wound around his waist as he moved on top of me, supporting his own weight so he wouldn't crush me. I laid my head back on my pillows, reveling in the sensations he created so deep within me. My heart was beating so hard it was nearly embarrassing. 

Three days to the wedding, and Edward was obviously excited. But there was something more than his pre-marital bliss that was fueling his kisses. I placed my hands on either side of his face, showing I wanted him to move back up to my lips. I kissed him softly, but he responded with the kind of passion I'd experienced in only one other instance. I immediately broke the kiss, but again, he moved to my neck. 

"What's wrong, Edward?"

"Nothing. Nothing is wrong, Bella."

"Edward…"

"I promise you, everything is wonderful."

"Then what happened to make you so happy?"

He looked up at me, smirking impishly as he dazzled me with his golden eyes, obviously aware he was doing so. "You."

I rolled my eyes at him, adjusting myself underneath him so I could see him better. "No seriously, Edward. What happened?"

He rolled off me, shifting an arm so I was propped up against him, my head in his chest, his other hand playing with my hair. He kissed my forehead. "You were speaking in your sleep again."

I froze. What did I say this time? Edward wasn't able to read my mind, but with me blabbering like an idiot every time I was unconscious, he might as well be able to. 

He continued. "You told Alice to stop fussing over your dress, so I gather it was something about our wedding?"

I still cringed slightly at the word, though I tried my best to hide it. "Sounds…possible."

He tilted my chin towards him, so I was forced to look in his eyes. They were smoldering; his intensity was overwhelming. "You said, 'I do'. And for the first time, you sounded happy about it. About the wedding. About us," he softly pressed his lips to mine, then trailed his mouth over to my ear. He whispered with a smile in his voice, "It made me very happy, indeed."

And in that moment, something changed. I wasn't excited for the wedding, I hadn't even accepted it. But somewhere inside me, some broken part of me that was terrified of marriage snapped into place. Like someone turned on a light switch, and I was filled with this strange contentment. I realized…no, remembered that Edward was all I ever wanted, more than I deserved, and perfect enough to accept my flaws. Edward and I weren't going to be Renée and Charlie. We loved each other enough to last every lifetime eternity would bring us. And I felt the tears sting my cheeks as I felt my breathing change. For the first time, I wanted his ring. 

Edward obviously misinterpreted my tears, and his eyes turned from ecstasy to shame. "Bella, I'm sorry, I never should have said anything about it. I know you're terrified and you would rather not marry me—"

"Don't say that. Never say that."

He looked at me confused. "Bella, I don't mind, I understand you're afraid—"

"I'm not. Not anymore."

His eyes narrowed at me, but I could see hope written in his features, no matter how he tried to mask it with nonchalance. "I'm not following you, Bella…"

"I don't understand it anymore than you do. I just…I'm not scared anymore. Well, actually that's not true, I'm terrified. But it's a good kind of scared. The kind of scared that people are supposed to be before they get married. Edward…I want my ring."

His eyes immediately darkened, his emotion so intense, and his breathing grew increasingly more ragged. He nearly sounded angry. "I said you didn't have to wear it when we were alone if you didn't—"

"I know. I want to. Edward, I'm scared to death of this, but I…I want to be your wife."

Every bit of his charade broke, and he was beaming with unending joy. I've never seen him happier. "Why?"

My laughter could not be contained. "I have no idea!"

He kissed me full on the mouth, hard and dominating, but his lips were curved in a smile. My tears wet his cheeks as well as my own, and I opened my mouth to his tongue, letting him explore my mouth as I sighed in contentment, losing myself to the up-in-the-clouds sensation his kisses always induced. We didn't stop for some time, and when he finally broke the kiss, my heart was beating nearly out of my chest and my vision was hazy from the lack of oxygen. He rummaged in his jeans pocket before taking my left hand. He slid the ring easily onto my finger, then kissing my ring and every finger, then my palm, then up my arm, then across my chest. He knew he was teasing me. And I hated that I'd decided to be the noble one and make us wait until after we were married. Well, yes, it was to save his soul. Which was the best option, infuriating as it was. 

Then I had an idea. I kissed him quickly, then pulling away slightly before he had the chance to react to it. He was still faster than me, like always, and his hand cupped my cheek and our foreheads rested together. He was a breath away from me when I began to speak. "Edward, can we discuss something?"

He exhaled a broken breath, trying to gain some of his composure back. His answer seemed strained. "Of course…"

"You remember how I said I wanted to wait?"

"Vaguely."

I smiled at his sarcasm. If he could laugh at the situation, maybe I could, too. It would at least make it less embarrassing. "Well I was thinking…I haven't changed my mind or anything it's just…well I thought that maybe…well see other couples do…other things. Before the _big_ thing…you know?"

He moved his head away from mine, running the cool pad of his thumb across my burning cheek. "You are positively unable to converse about this normally, aren't you?"

I shook my head, mortified. He lifted my chin. "It's endearing. Infuriating, yes, but endearing. Much like the rest of you, I might add." 

His words gave me the courage to spit the rest of it out. Hopefully he'd figure out what I meant from what I actually said. "Just how far does that endless self-control of yours go?"

I'd meant the words innocently enough, but the fire they started in his eyes surprised me. He moved his forehead back to mine, twining our fingers together, holding our arms between us. His breath was pleasantly cool, like spearmint. "As far as you want it to go. Like I said, Bella, it's your way now. As long as you're happy."

"You promise?"

He brought his mouth to my ear again, and whispered the two words that used to frighten me beyond all else. Now they were simply perfect. "I do."

He captured my lips again and I exhaled into his mouth. My fingers laced in his hair as he moved down to my shoulders, pausing in the hollow of my neck. I ran my hand down his shoulders to his arm, then following it to his hand. I moved his hand under the hem of my shirt onto my bare stomach, and I felt a small moan escape me as a chill spread through my body. 

Edward was not getting the hint. Either that or he was still playing it safe. He seemed unsure, like he was afraid of going too far for me. I wrapped my fingers around his wrist and slowly moved our hands upward, hoping he would realize what I meant. He continued on his own at an agonizingly slow pace, but eventually I could feel the tips of his fingers at the edge of my bra. 

I broke the kiss to breathe, but again he misinterpreted what I meant. He quickly retracted his hand and supported himself above me, worry in his eyes. "Did I hurt you?"

I would have laughed had I not been so frustrated. "You didn't even touch me. I'm not breakable."

He shook his head slightly. "Yes, you are."

I rolled my eyes. "You know what I mean, Edward. You handle my frail human nature every day. This shouldn't be that much different—"

"You don't understand the self-control it takes not to—"

"You were the one who said it was my way now, that you could handle it—"

"Perhaps I overestimated myself—"

"Well if it's that difficult for you, then here!" My hands went immediately to the hem of my shirt and pulled the offending clothing over my head, flinging it to the floor. Edward sat back on his knees, a look of shock mingled with desire in his expression. I didn't think he would react so greatly; it was only my shirt. I was still wearing a bra, and it was a comfortable white cotton one at that. But he was looking at me like I was edible, which probably should have alarmed me, but it was his eyes. He was looking at me like I looked at him, telling me I was all he wanted. His hesitation was reverent, like he was afraid that if he touched me, I would evaporate. I felt the blood rush to my cheeks, along with some of my former shame. I searched for my voice. 

"Edward?"

He closed his eyes and turned away for a moment before answering me. "Yes?"

"You alright?" 

He took only a moment to answer, but it seemed like forever. I was afraid the scent of my blood was too much for him. It seemed like ages since I'd had to worry about that, but this was also the least amount of clothing he'd ever seen me in. I felt like an idiot. 

"I am fine."

I felt the blush in my cheeks get hotter and hotter, and I couldn't stand the embarrassment any longer. He obviously wasn't as ready for this as he was pretending. I dropped my gaze from his and sat up slightly, looking for my shirt. "Well never mind then, this was a bad idea, I'm sorry…" I had one arm in my shirt when he finally made a motion. 

His hand shot out to my bare shoulder as his other clasped around the back of my neck, tilting my head up to his. "Don't, Bella."

"What?"

"Don't apologize. This was the best idea you've ever had." 

He slipped the shirt off my arm and tossed it aside, laying me back down in bed, his mouth at my ear. "Your way. I promised," I breathed a sigh of relief at his words. He continued. "It might just take me more time to adjust than it does for you."

I felt my embarrassment begin to ease, though my breathing was growing increasingly uneven. "I didn't mean to—"

"Shh…it wasn't anything you did. You just don't realize how startling you are."

He kissed up the side of my neck before he reached my mouth. His eyes were dark with wanton desire when he reached for me. The back of his hand ran across my cheek. "You are so beautiful."

And we were lost to each other. His lips came crashing down and all else was forgotten. Again my hand smoothed through his hair, holding him as close to me as I could. This time, he held nothing back. He had obviously adjusted now. 

Our openmouthed kisses turned to a battle for dominance. He was relentless; my heart picked up the pace. I turned my head reluctantly to breathe, but he still did not stop. He moved to the base of my neck, then continued lower, all his former hesitation gone. I felt a hand on my stomach, a feather-light caress moving up, up, further than before, until the cool of his hand rested on my breast. I breathed a moan, immediately feeling my reaction to him. 

He trailed his thumb across the fabric, finding the place that would make me writhe beneath him. His other hand mimicked his ministrations, and soon I could do nothing but surrender to him. I felt a finger trace the top of the cup of my bra, sliding ever so slightly underneath the fabric. I bit my lip. He followed the same course three times before sliding up the strap and slipping it off my shoulder. He kissed the skin it revealed, then reached around to unhook it. He did so with a quick motion of his hand. I was confused. 

"How did you do that?" 

An uneasy smirk came to his lips. "When you live with Emmett and Jasper and can read minds…you learn things."

I laughed with understanding. "I am so sorry."

He shrugged. "At last it's becoming useful." With that, he slipped the other strap off my shoulder and pulled slightly, showing me how loose it was. "Is this alright?"

I nodded. "It was kind of the point."

His motions were deliberate; it was obvious from the calculated grace with which he moved his hands. I kept eye contact with him until I heard him dispose of the bra on the floor. He still did not look away. I closed my eyes, feeling suddenly self-conscious, being this exposed to him. I could not bear to watch him look at me, he was perfection, and I was…not.

"Bella?"

His murmured breath brought me out of my thoughts. Still I did not look at him. I felt his hand against my cheek, and he kissed me softly. "Bella, dear, look at me."

I felt his love surge through me, and it gave me the strength to open my lids. Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw. Edward was smiling down at me with a chiding look of thanks. He didn't have to read my mind to know what I was thinking. "Why are you still shy?"

I shrugged, a laugh catching in my throat. The tension in the air was palpable, and I had no idea how he was handling the stop/start routine we'd unwittingly created. He rested his hands on my collarbone, just above my breasts. He quirked an eyebrow upward as he spoke.

"May I? I believe it was 'kind of the point'," he winked, and with that, my fear of rejection evaporated. 

Tentatively, he brushed the palms of his hands across my chest; I felt my nipples harden at the feather-light caress. He weighed my breasts in his hands, his thumbs rubbing the tight peaks. A sigh escaped my throat as my breathing quickened. It was all the encouragement he needed. Edward bent his head and captured a nipple in his mouth. Nothing could have prepared me for the feeling of his icy mouth surrounding me, his tongue circling me. His hand paid attention to my other breast as he gently nipped me. It called a moan of surprise and pleasure from a place deep within me. He moved his mouth to my other breast, and a delicious heat began to pool in my lower belly, settling itself between my legs. I didn't know how to tell him what I wanted. 

I began to unbutton his shirt, and soon it met mine on the ground. I tugged at his hair, telling him to move up where I could kiss him, and he crushed his lips against mine. His tongue darted out to taste mine and all I could do was kiss him back, hold him tighter, tighter. The skin on his chest abraded my sensitive peaks, and my hips rose to meet his in response. I more felt than heard his low growl of approval. Experimentally, I raised my hips again, positioning myself so my aching center was against his obvious arousal. Again, I heard the sound. It emboldened me, giving me a sense of power. I continued, somewhat surprised when he ground his hips against mine. I gave a small cry and he moved his mouth to my ear. 

"Did I hurt you, love?"

I shook my head vehemently. "No."

His hand trailed across my breast and rested low on my stomach, his fingers toying with the waistband of my pajama pants. "Tell me to stop and I stop."

"Don't stop. Not yet," I felt his hand begin to slide lower, and I kissed his shoulder in encouragement, my arm wrapped tightly around his neck, "I need you, Edward."

"You will have me. However, whenever."

My breath came in shallow pants as I felt him slide my remaining clothing away. I kicked my pajamas off my feet, leaving me in only my underwear. My head was swimming with sensation as one hand rested where I longed for him most, the other back on my breast. "I don't know how to…how to tell you what—"

"A simple yes or no would suffice. Can you do that?"

I nodded again, feeling a pleasant perspiration at my hairline, all of me was coiled tight in anticipation. I was radiating heat, and his hand was pleasantly cool, the stark contrast only adding to the intensity of his touch. He rubbed me slowly through the fabric of my underwear, and my hips met his, a sigh on my lips. He was still learning how to control himself with this level of contact; his eyebrows knit together in fierce concentration. After a moment, he found his center again, and was able to move forward. I was completely at his mercy, waiting for the moment when he would finally remove the last barrier between me and bliss. 

He slid my underwear down my legs and replaced his hand. He found the sensitive bundle of nerves and continued to stroke, finding a rhythm that was sinuous and frustrating, not enough pressure, not nearly enough, I needed him so desperately.

"More," the command was on my lips before I knew I'd formed the word. 

He responded, his face again the picture of concentration. He increased his pace, capturing my nipple in his mouth, continuing the rhythm, allowing the tension inside me to build. I felt small spasms in my legs and I knew I was close, so close to the overwhelming ecstasy I knew lay ahead. My arms wrapped around his back, clinging on for dear life, and for the first time, Edward took the initiative. I felt him insert a cool finger inside me, and I buried my face in his shoulder, trying to conceal my moans of delight. My inner muscles contracted around him, drawing him deeper, his name an endless mantra on my lips. He curled his finger inside me as he scraped his teeth against my breast, tracing his free hand along my side. I could not keep still, I was moving erratically beneath him, and then I felt it. 

"Edward!" I called out to him as I went spiraling out of control, my body crashing down in the most powerful release I'd ever known. My chest was heaving for air and I felt so utterly _complete_…his body rested slightly heavier on mine, our skin sticking together slightly in our aftermath. 

When I regained conscious thought, I was on top of him, my hair plastered against his chest as he toyed with a strand in absent thought. I had a permanent smile as I looked up at him, kissing his jaw. "I love you, Edward."

He held me closer. "And I, you, Bella."

I breathed a small, embarrassed laugh. "Sorry."

"For what?"

"For having all the fun."

He chuckled knowingly to himself. "That's not even a little true, Bella." 

I twined my hand with his and squeezed; he turned the ring on my finger in utter delight. "You have made me so happy today, Bella."

I felt a mischievous grin take over my expression. "You just wait. You'll get yours."

He held me a little tighter, though I didn't miss his slight hiss of anticipation. "I intend to."


End file.
